Nurse's first duty is to facility's elderly residents, not staff member
(this article was first published in the LifeStyles section of the August 3, 2009 edition of the Lowell Sun. If you're interested in viewing other articles, click here.)

Stress Unit
By MICHAEL HAYDEN, Sun Correspondent
Lowell Sun

DEAR MIKE: I work as a nurse in a facility that caters to the elderly; most of our residents are pretty well off financially. Many of them still take care of a lot of their own financial needs, including making trips to their banks.

The facility has an unwritten rule that residents are not to have more than $100 on their person at any given time but it's well known that a lot of them carry much more than that.

It has come to my attention that one of the older nursing assistants is in the habit of borrowing money from a lot of these residents. To make matters worse, she gambles frequently.

My sister knows her very well and tells me that a few months ago she won $10,000 on a lottery scratch ticket. After paying the taxes and paying back what she borrowed from residents, she only ended up with a couple of hundred dollars.

This makes me extremely angry because I think this woman is taking advantage of these people. Sooner or later, she won't be able to repay what she owes and these people will be left high and dry.

Making the problem worse is the fact that this woman has worked here for more than 20 years. She is a sweetheart of a person, treats the residents very well and is a joy to work with. I do not believe you could find a person who does not like this woman. My sister says I should mind my own business and that it's no big deal because the residents she is borrowing the money from lend it willingly, are being paid back and can afford it.

I am torn between doing something and just keeping my mouth shut. Do you have any suggestions? -- Tonya

DEAR TONYA: First of all, let's look at the big picture. You have a trusted and well-liked employee whose job is to look after these elderly residents. They rely on her and others like her to make sure they remain safe and out of harm's way. The problem is this person is harm's way. How can these residents feel safe if the fox is sitting right in the hen house with them?

You have a moral and legal obligation as a mandated reporter to do something about this. What is going on is nothing short of elder abuse. I would recommend a conversation with your immediate supervisor ASAP. While this woman may seem like a wonderful person on the outside, make no bones about it -- she is a predator.

Also, it appears she has a serious problem of her own -- gambling -- that she needs help for immediately. You have no other choice but to turn this over to your supervisor before something worse happens. I think you'll find that the reasonable people you work with will agree with you completely.

Remember, you are obligated to the elderly residents here, not the troubled employee. You might also suggest that, because of the situation that has developed, your facility should look into turning that unwritten rule of how much money residents are allowed to carry into a written rule.

Good luck. -- Mike

Michael Hayden is a certified anger management counselor who runs Bay State Anger Management and Counseling in Chelmsford. Send questions to him at Stressunit@aol.com or send mail to: Stress Unit, c/o The Editor, Box 1477, Lowell, MA 01853.